Happy New Year!               

 Prayers to you All..  For a wonderful 2020..  and beyond!

Fwd: I'm coming! I'm promise

I'm still trying to figure out what I shall write about.  This is not as easy as I thought, or perhaps sharing my truth is just more scarier than I thought it'd be? either way I'll get this.  I know I will.   I need help..  Lord send me help.  Guide me, In Jesus name.. Amen. 

Are you comfortable being the only race of your kind in any setting?

I personally grew up around a very diverse group of people..   It's just where we lived, how we lived.

But for some reason when I  went to school there was always more white children than black.  And I certainly never saw all the different nationalities that I saw when my children were going to school.  Times have indeed changed!  even up til this day.  But of course I let no cat out of the bag.. This is no surprise.  And I will dare to say things are indeed changing for the better in this world.  

As I spend my last day here in River Falls Wisconsin.  I think of what a wonderful time I've had.

These folks here in this town..  *from what I've seen*  don't see color.  My second day here I did see 2 black children in a parade.. "Children"  meaning they must have parents. Therefore  there has to be at least one black couple that lives here..  or at least the next town over.  OR perhaps they've been adopted.  Either way I saw them.  I knew there had to others around here some where.  BUT..  I never saw any more.  I never saw another Black person, no Russians,  no Africans, No other races..  I did see some Asians..  They run a Chinese restaurant across the street from my friends house.   Oh, and I saw one Hispanic.  She stated she was down for school.  (Yes I asked) 

Bottom line,  I felt comfortable.   I went to the store, I went to bars, out to eat.  Even got a tattoo! Everyone was SO friendly!  Everywhere I went.   Hats off,  to the Town of River Falls and their cab service! for being so kind to a gal who clearly was not like the rest of y'all  💕

Have you ever visited a town or city that you've been the only race? 

Thank you for stopping by! 💙🚰

 Settling back in after being on the road caring for my dad.  AND visiting a friend.

There's that pause button again!

Sometimes you have to pause things in your life.  For whatever reason,  Life just calls for a time out.   And frankly, you cannot move forward until a matter.. or matters have been solved/dealt with.  

It's very hard to perform my normal activities away from home.  My time is not truly "my time"..  Not in my current setting.  So, I feel like I can't really talk about a product I want to share..  and I definitely can't do any cooking.  I'm in the country so wifi is also unreliable..   As I've even tried to have video chats and phone calls.   "Hello  Hello..   HELLO..   are you there?"

I took on 2 endeavors shortly before I left my home. I  left sort of on short notice..  My current trip wasn't  planned as it occurred.   I've basically put everything on hold.  BUT  It's not like I was established!  It's just hard to put creativity on hold.  My natural self feels restricted, and I find myself slipping into a silent void.   But I wont allow it!  This is my second attempt at a blog and I will continue.  I'm going to do this!  I've still not picked any other blogs to follow..  but I will.   I want to be sincerely interested in whatever I do choose.  But for now..  It's a slow crawl.   I will just continue to share my heart.

Thank you for dropping by!🚰💙

The circle of life....

A little secret most people don't know about me, and that is that I like space and science.  I'm intrigued about different aspects of it.   I enjoy knowing/seeing how things works.. not necessarily LEARNING it.  But just seeing it, I'm all visual.  Curious.  It's like I only want to know for my own curiosity.   Kind of like..  what makes the world go around?!  Will the world ever TRULY end?!  Or will we continue to be born and then die in shifts/groups.  THEN repeat!

I'm just so inquisitive about life! and it's process.  It is simply amazing how we're born..  we grow.. then we shrivel up!  We become child like again..  and die.

Years ago when my mom died, shortly there after her friends/peers starting dying..   I feel soon it will be me.. and my peers ... (I'm 52, 1966) Then it will be my children, and their group/peers..  And so on.  I call it the circle of life.   It's very hard being around someone who you know is approaching that end stage..   How does one care for those that do not wish to care for themselves?!  You cannot.   Having worked with a huge geriatric population..  I can tell you, many of them do not believe they're any less capable than they once were in their lives of youth.   We will all be in denial when it comes to our own self awareness on safety when aging.  We will ALL believe we can do as we once did before. So how can we help ourselves if we'll all be in denial?  Tell yourselves RIGHT NOW!   "I will trust my family"   whomever that may be.  Make that decision now..  Because only they will be the ones who you truly believe when you're told what you're doing is unsafe.    

Knowing you need help is the best condition to have when aging..  And trusting those around you, is not a bad side effect.  

"As people age, they will inevitably find themselves depending on others for help with daily tasks. A loss of independence is a natural part of growing older, and it's important to know how to cope in the best way possible.  "

https://www.consumeraffairs.com/health/loss-of-independence.html  

  

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rwvKzfEWTzk  

Thank you for dropping by!

The type of love I can do without. Not interested!

Unless..  You're in the State of Florida, or have these nasty little pest in your State; you cannot imagine how vile these things are.   I'm told, they can't hurt me..  that's not the point.  The point is they're extremely gross!!  They're literally EVERYWHERE     You rarely see a single one.. and if you do.. it's not long before another one latching on to it..  hence love bugs!

 

Apparently, there are millions and millions and millions of them.  Because any driving you do here, especially high way,  they slam into the front of your car bumper as well as into your windshield, sounding like rain and leaving raindrop like splashes..  it's just horrid.  Their bloody oily bodies stain your windshields and front car bumper like a Military battle field! casualties 

EVERYWHERE!     And it (the mess) does not wash easily.   You'd think there's no more to be seen.  Think again!  they're like black snow flakes..  Never ending.   So..  What's the point of being in love and having massive sex if you're just going to die horrible death anyways?!🤔

OK,  Never-mind.     I realize some of you wouldn't mind going out that way. 😎

 

Thank you for dropping by!💙 🚰

Learn more about love bugs:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lovebug  

Traveling and adapting

 I'm currently in Florida (from here I'll be heading to Wisconsin, then back home to Seattle WA)   I'm here visiting and attempting to help my 78 year old dad.   I used the word attempting,..because he's my daddy and things have to be done his way.   That's the thing about old people.. and I know I'll probably be the same way, They need things done their way.  And truthfully many of us don't necessarily need to be old to want things done our own way.. It's just human nature.  We all have our own way of doing things..  whether it be reasonable or not.

 

The adapting part:

It's difficult staying on track with church, prayer, eating healthy, drinking my kangen water, using my CBD products..  Taking my medicine..  JUST adapting period! when traveling.  But it must be done! We must find ways to incorporate

The things that benefit and promote our well being and good health.

Your body feels different when you stop giving it something it's been getting over a long period of time.  You don't have to be an expert to know that one.   At any rate I'm finally drinking my Kangen water.  And other things have fallen into place.  But I must say!  Those that travel🌏🛩 a lot must have it down to a science.

Because, right now..  for me to travel, it's a big deal.  But I'm learning..  LEARNING how to adapt 💪

Thank you for dropping by!💙

If you don't lie, You'll never survive.

I recently told a bold face lie.  It's not the first time!🙄 and I can only imagine it will not be the last;  Only because I'm not perfect! and I will never act as if I am😇.  BUT.. If I shoot for the moon.. I could very well land on the stars. (We must aim high when it comes to morals💕) Well...  Praise the Lord my father in heaven didn't allow me to succeed in my Lie;  *It wasn't good for my soul* Though the battle was won by an opposing liar.. (I had someone lying to me as well)  In the end, I made a moral decision. Though my lie was to help a cause..  my op posers lie was about greed!

Lying is a crafty skill, to be good at it is nothing to brag about!  Many people are doing it; They make themselves feel better by justifying it,(the lie) Like I just did above!🤕 some don't even need to justify!  They just lie by default, it's what they've always known.  

Have you ever heard a story so crazy it sounds like a lie?  Well, the owner of the story may feel it's just too crazy to believe so they'll lie by default.  It's easier in their eyes!  I use to work with a nurse that would ask what happen? when a patient was found on floor (a fall) Once she'd hear the story, If It didn't sound believable to her, she'd say.. "No, I don't think so"  she couldn't accept the truth!  And in the medical field, the truth is often rearranged.. pick your reason of why,  There are plenty💜  That's just the way of the business.  Every business has and will always protect themselves!  No body will purposefully incriminate themselves.  

Think of your own young children.. when they report they've broken something around the house.. they'll not say the part where they were probably running through the house. 😷 😎  So, just like in our parenting, We make things safer around the house..  hospitals adapt and modify rules and practices to help keep the patients safe and accident free while in their care. 

But back to my point..  It's just so hard to live a lie free life😇.  I guess it just depends on what kind of lying one is doing and WHY.  Bottom line!!  people lie.  For me, I'm not good at it.. and that's ok.  I prefer to follow the rules of the land and life, while living by Gods words as much as my flesh will allow.  And I am only addressing a fact! ....   It's hard not to ever lie!   But we must always choose the moral path..  where ever that may lead.  May we all just TRY to do better on this earth..  I'm just simply here to encourage us ALL to try.

Proverbs 6:16-19 King James Version (KJV)

16 These six things doth the Lord hate: yea, seven are an abomination unto him:

17 A proud look, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood,

18 An heart that deviseth wicked imaginations, feet that be swift in running to mischief,

19 A false witness that speaketh lies, and he that soweth discord among brethren.

Thank you for stopping by!💙

Are you ready to stop buying water? and start changing your life?

https://www.facebook.com/kangenbetty/videos/1904323413006788/

You can't be that naive!

 Yesterday I spent  some time on the phone with a friend..  The only friend who knows of my up bringing! she knows who I was then, and who I am now.  And truthfully, she would most likely say, I am that same person today.  Moving forward -  I was loathing in self pity;  And she said to me..  "Brenda, you can't be that naive to think you're  the only one  who had a tough childhood!?"  Well, she pulled me right out of it! and quick!..  right out of my own self pity.  I've been hearing those 5 words over and over since our chat.  

*It inspired this blog post*

You can't be that naive.  From that point of view how could I possibly go on loathing?! I couldn't.  She shaped me right up. Yes, things were tough..  But that's the past, why do I keep reliving it as if it is somehow affecting my life today.  NEWS FLASH! it's what many of us do. 

It's as if we want a reason to be sad.  A reason to not succeed.  I can only speak for myself, but I do believe this has been my battle.  I know I'm not good enough.  But yet I know I am!  But not really.. ok, maybe.  Well, sometimes!  Like with support I can be good enough.  But not all on my own.  I could never be the center of attention, It's been tried, I bomb!  My life is too weird..  I'm too weird!  I can't get out there in front of people, this is the best I can do.  

How are others doing it?  Why can't I be like them?  but I don't want to be like them.  I want to be like me..  But "me" is flawed.  Yet...   

I can't be that naive to think I'm the only one who has ever had a tough childhood,  the only one who has ever been divorced,  the only one who has ever had cancer, the only one who has ever had their life altered unfairly, the only one who cries, the only one who is and feels so alone is this world.  No..  I'm not that naive.  But perhaps I'm that selfish!  and so self centered that I can only think of myself.  And that's exactly what it is!  It's selfishness! it's me ism.

I never thought of myself as selfish, but..  perhaps we all are.  Those that are always complaining about their trails & tribulations. They probably don't see it either.. but it is a form of me ism.  I've no suggestions on how to fix this.  But for me..  I honestly want to stop it! I want to stop all the negative thoughts, living in the past..  Thinking/feeling/behaving/believing I'm not good enough; Because..   I  know deep down inside I am.   I don't wish to be naive!💕  

We live in a time where everyone compares everything from job status to who's sicker than who..  everyone want's to share their pity.  The pity stage just isn't big enough for the entire world.  Many others have gone before me.. Having to overcome challenges  AND they have prevailed.  So.. why can't I? and why can't you?  what makes us so special that the world must feel sorry for us. 

We!...  can't be that naive!  to think that we are the only one's who have ever fallen on tough times.   I encourage you to be strong💪this day!  I will as well. (((hugs))) 💞

Thank you for stopping by!💙

 

Don't let anyone tell you who you should be.

I have done a lot of self help over the years.  I've known since I was a teenager, that I was not like most.   I knew before I was married,  that my then husband was quite different me.  

After many years have passed, and me seeing therapist..(s)  trying to fix myself so others would like me better;  including my husband.   I've realized that I am indeed operating on a higher emotional level than most.  No therapist would give me any pills, nor did they deem me crazy.  Honestly, I had to beg for help with my anxiety.  I look well put together and carry myself in a graceful manner.  AND I've been told I look strong and confident.  

I've ran into a few people in my life that totally get me..  And I get them.  

We all have our own personalities, code of behavior, and sometimes we say or do things others wouldn't do, therefore others feel we shouldn't do it as well!  it's not something "They're" comfortable with.  (We like to impose our ethics on one another)    How we speak, how we live,  who we date/ marry,  who we vote fore...  even how we work.  We all have a different work ethic!  This is were good workers, bad or lazy workers come in.. *as far as we're concerned*  But often these workers just aren't willing to go the extra mile as you or myself.  So we label them as bad and OR LAZY.  I have personally worked with SO many LAZY workers..  in my opinion.  But.. that's the problem!  it is only my opinion.  Just because they didn't work to the tune of my ethics, didn't and doesn't  mean they're  bad or lazy.   It does however mean we're operating on a different level of work ethic.  All this isn't  a bad thing.. it's just a you are YOU 🍎and I am ME thing!🍅

When we meet people that  insist on mocking us for being different from them

We must understand they truly know no better.  Their level of intelligence doesn't compare to yours.   None of this is bad!  We just need to be aware of it.

If you're operating on a higher emotional level..  You have to surround yourselves around like minded minds..  Those that are most like you. It matters!  emotional intelligence is very real.   That's what it's called!

Some of us are unable to reach into that deep place of sincerity.  But like me! you can learn.. and change!  You can actually be who you truthfully want to be.   And it doesn't have to be related to this blog post..  I simply want you to just BE YOU!  and do not let someone else decide that for you🤔

Thank you for stopping by!💙

13 Signs of High Emotional Intelligence | Inc.com

https://www.inc.com/justin-bariso/13-things-emotionally-intelligent-people-do.html

  

Protect your castle

 I've had many guest over the years, all of which I invite in and sincerely encourage them to feel comfortable.   I do believe our home speaks to our guest when they enter.. and then again when they leave.  Think about that for a second.

I was/am so pleased to hear my guests  say things like  " Your place feels so cozy"  "I feel such a good spirit in here"    "I like it here"...   AND so many other things I've heard from my guest over the years.  Even maintenance staff come in and I can just see the look on their faces..👷  It's a surprised one👲.      I had to call 911 once for a neighbor that needed my support... (she came to my door and I let her in, I'd never seen nor met her up til that point.   She came to the right place👼)   AND 4 fire fighters came.. 🚒🚑 all in my small place, It was a calm and pleasant rescue.  I've since seen this girl.. and she is doing great! praise God! 

How many of you pray over your homes🏠/apartments🏙?  How about your cars🚗 That's a real thing you know?  I'm always praying over my shelter;  praying that all who enter will be blessed.  I use to pray over my car as well, not to keep it scratch free... but to keep it maintained so that I can travel back and fourth to work.. so I can make money from the job🏥 that the Lord blessed me with.  You see, it's ALL connected.  Think about it🙏🤔😊

When you keep your shelter prayed over...   And do it often.  The devil cannot come through your doors.. nor windows.  Now, This post may be too deep for some.  But profound for others.   Praying is MY way of life..  No worries if it is not YOURS.

I would only encourage you to just keep negative energy out of your space.  Just make sure you're surrounding yourselves, family and friends with good clean energy.  Unfortunately  bad energy DOES exist 📖   And our homes are our castles.

Protect your castles🚷

Thank you for stopping by!💙 🚰

Looking through a clear lens

To be able to see life through a clear lens, we must be willing to clear the fog and film that often covers our eyes,  And affects the way we view others!  What you SEE is not always what you GET.  Be mindful of sincerity, it's not for everyone.. so, stay close to those that offer it!🙏🚰

Thank you for stopping by!💙

Learning a new way to generate income

I've been thinking for a long time, what kind of work could I do? How will I survive? now that I no longer work outside the home, due to disabilities I now have.  Life is so different for me now, strangely it is for the better.. in many ways;  Yet, I am so limited in others.  I am extremely blessed to have some people in my life that have said:  "Brenda we're going to help you"  Help me learn how to be an independent business person.  I'm so helpless right now.  I'm learning how to have a business from friends. Though I watched my ex husband run his business for over 20yrs! it's still hard for me. You have to be firm with people, You have to be smart!  You have to know about your product, and speak confidently about it.  So, I'm hoping this raw/sincere blog will help you! in all area's of your lives.  Please remember/ understand, I am no body special.   I am someone who is just like YOU!.  Rebuilding my life at age 52 is no joke. I'm afraid, and doubtful.  But I cannot allow those words into my heart and head.  I'm entering a place I wouldn't have dared to enter about 3yrs ago.  It's amazing how life changes can force us out of that comfort zone that many of us live in.  

Thank you for stopping by!💙

The last super

Yesterday I cooked, and when I cook I normally have pieces of leftover vegetables.  Depending on the vegetables I'll either blend and drink them, salad them or soup them.  Well  I made soup, and decided I needed some beef to add.  So my son took me to the store.. He waits in the car.  I was smart!  I knew I didn't feel right.. so I decided to ride the cart (You know those carts most stores have) Just to be safe.  Long story short..  I had a horrible anxiety attack.  Perhaps it was even panic!  I rode my cart up to the checker, got off the cart and told the lady I was sick.  She thought maybe I needed to split.. Leave.  I laid my head down on the counter and told her I was sorry.  Then thought to myself, I NEED this beef!  and of course I had more than beef..  Some other things I'd been needing.. not much  But not just the beef!

As I held my head down, she rang up my things.  Once I saw the price I handed her some money and begin to walk away;  As I was walking away,  I told the lady my son was in the car and I'd send him in for my bag.  She insisted on walking me to the car and she carried my bag.  I felt faint and nauseous,  I got home and had dry heaves.  I was moaning then started to cry..  I thought to myself, IS THIS IT?  am I going to join Elizabeth!? - Sanford & Son 

My son knew better than to stay, He dropped me off and left, he didn't want to witness what was surely to be a night of crying and uncertainty.  I knew I was alone, just me and the lord.  I begged the lord to hold me, as my heart felt like it would beat right out of my chest.  At that point I started calling anyone that would pick up.  I reached a friend.. and that was all the medication I needed.  She talked me down from that cliff I was almost to fall off.   

Sometimes there is no rhyme nor reason for anxiety.  It just shows up! out of nowhere.  I suppose I've invited it, a time or 6.  Doing too much, not getting my sleep.. Just not focusing on my inner self.   I've been lead to believe I can control it..  I do try.  But so far all I seem to be able to control is how I handle it when it comes. I've yet to master the skill that keeps it at bay.  

If you're like me.. I feel your pain! strength💪 is all we have🙏🙌 💃 Always reach out.  It truly is the best medication, and it's instant. 😀

Thank you for stopping by!💙

Happy Sunday evening!

Thank you for stopping by!💙

Living with alkaline

Living with alkaline!  I thought that'd be a fun title.  I am not about to act like an expert on any of the products I use in my life.  But I will be sharing 2 of them frequently as I journey through this blog also giving you the opportunity to learn more about them. (and maybe trying them)  I do drink alkaline water and I drink it all day long.  I strongly believe it helped save my life and keeps me cancer free.  [That of course is only my opinion]  You cannot buy from the stores what I drink.  I chose to do more than JUST write on this blog; I thought I could also start a business in conjunction, because let's be honest, if there is money to be made I could definitely use it.  I don't work outside the home and this is something I can do naturally.

Sharing my heart and my life comes to me very naturally, I think the reason is spiritual.   I want to share my journey with you..  I'll be sharing many cooking recipes as well..  SO why not share my recipe back to good health🤔😀..   And speaking of cooking!  I plan to do some of it today.   My plan is to keep this blog exciting!  with videos and pictures.  (But don't forget )  It's new and I'm learning 😊

Thank you for stopping by!💙

Growing up all over again

I actually have a pretty good life.  It's what I know and I have also been told.  Sometimes I forget to tap into the greatness and the gratefulness that I know dwells within my heart and mind. I do believe I am someone who is afraid of success. I've thought this over many times over the years.  I never saw myself learning more to do in life.  I'm not someone who has had many jobs in my life. I worked as a nursing assistant since I was 18yrs.  Before that, I worked in a kitchen as a dietary aid. AND before that I worked at 2 different restaurants.  So truthfully, my whole life has been about helping others, putting others first.  And of course when I started my family.. No one could argue about who came first in my house.. Yes, it was the children. I can no longer do the work I use to.. Taking care of people is no longer an option.  I have a huge job just caring for myself.  However It does seem strange to not have anyone to care for or about.  Don't get me wrong, I care about people! especially my family, but they don't need me making decisions for them anymore. I once made decisions for people, on a small scale.. but nonetheless I was helpful to them. Helping them decide what was going to be done to facilitate the night/evening/day.  When my life did a 180.. I feel as if yes, it went backwards.  I was now in the role of having decisions being made for me.   I felt so powerless.  My self esteem was never that great, and my decline in life did not help.  But here I am 3 yrs in, cancer free! ready to rock my life again.  It's as if God gave me a do over.  And he has placed tools and people in my life to help me grow up.. all over again. 

Thank you for dropping by!💙

My First Post of Many

I'm super excited about finally being able to do what I love..  Sharing my heart.  This blog will allow me to do just that. While incorporating My 2 endeavors/ businesses.   This platform will allow me a place to share all the creativity I have to offer.  My life has definitely changed! for the better. 

Thank you Steven Reynolds  for creating this website for me!